Everyone has a journey…

When you are young, after high school or college, if you took that route, life seems so exciting. It seems like nothing will ever go wrong. It did for me anyway. Even though I had a pretty disfunctional family of “origin.” That is what they call it if you’ve ever been to any type of therapy. Family of origin. That means the ones who lifted you up, fucked you up, tucked you in, turned you in the right direction or in the wrong direction, and the ones who gave you food and clothes, who taught you to do the right things, in their opinions, or the things they could get away with, anyway. My family of origin, my mom and dad, when I was a little kid, were very hard working. My dad was obsessive about working. He grew up in an orphanage so he was determined to be successful. And he was successful, in business. His personal life, even though he seemed to be having fun, was pretty much a hot mess. He was a bipolar/alcoholic. Most people loved my dad. We could go anywhere and he would know someone. I remember being at Disneyland and he would run into friends! My mom was what I thought was pretty much a “square.” Maybe my dad was abusive? I never saw it, well, maybe one time, I saw something that scared me, but my mom seemed sort of happy. She was lots of fun. She was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis when I was in first grade. I came home and she had been taken to the hospital. She was gone for 3 weeks and back then, kids didn’t go visit their mother in the hospital I guess, or maybe it was just in my family. My grandma hated hospitals. She hated hospitals so much that when my grandpa was dieing, she didn’t even go see him. So when I was staying with her, I guess she wouldn’t take me to go see my mom which now, thinking about it, she didn’t see her daughter, either. So looking back, my grandma was kind of messed up, too. I guess people just do the best they can and hope for the best. So, my point is, we all have a different journey, a unique journey, and we are all special and it is up to us to make it what we want.